Old Biography

Keith Donnelly...

Invented indoor hang-gliding...
Is the inventor and sole manufacturer of the Corduroy Pillow (currently making headlines)...
Can leap tall buildings in a single song...
Keeps losing his hair (in poker games)...
Is a grand master at full-contact tiddly winks...
Has invented a new number ('Squoff')...
Has such a successful collection of Bonsai trees he's looking for a house with a smaller garden...
Has designed a complete ecosystem for the year 3000 (without giving too much away - something like a cross between a Dyson Sphere and a Klein Bottle)...
Recently translated the complete works of Shakespeare back into the original Swahili...
Doesn't open his mail because he's tired of winning the Readers' Digest Prize Draw month after month...
Pays all his bills before he even gets them...
Holds the Cliff Diving record for parts of Biddulph...
Played Hamlet before he was born...
Is a covert agent for Kays catalogue...
Amazes even himself with his 5-dimensional flower arrangements...
Once read a book with no pictures just for the hell of it...
Fears nothing (and minus numbers)...
Was raised deep in the Tyneside Delta by a herd of pygmy albino wildebeest...
Was once heckled by Pavarotti and Bonnie Langford at the same time...
Can tread water...
Turned down numerous offers to join the Tweenies...
Once had a song banned by the BBC (which then went on to not be number 1)...
Has a theory that Nero playing a fiddle might have been Why they burned Rome...

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